Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Fast = Slow
Our church is entering a time of fasting and prayer. I am not an expert faster. I did a 40 Hour Famine with my youth group in high school and it was more fun than hardship. I probably concentrated more on the youth group guys than God during those 40 hours...
I've learned more about fasting as an adult, but it seems every time a corporate fasting opportunity arises, I am pregnant or nursing a baby. So I have always opted out with a rock solid excuse. Very convenient for one who is way too dependent on food. Ask Frank. I am one angry girl if I'm hungry. I have a hard time waiting to eat. So this time, I am nursing once again, and it would be really easy to not participate. But when I think of the sacrifice Jesus was for me, surely I can give up something that would cause me to lean on God a little bit more in daily life. But what?
So I prayed one of those scary prayers saying...God...I want to please you...I want to depend more on you and think about you more each day...if you want me to give something up instead of fasting...let me know...(and then I secretly hoped God would tell me that I didn't have to give anything up.)
For a couple of days nothing really came to mind. And then today...I got this thought...what about giving up...coffee.
I tried to argue. God are you sure??? Coffee? Does it have to be the coffee? I love coffee. Why does it have to be the coffee?? It was a short argument.
Abstaining from coffee it is. Probably until February. I almost laughed as I went to read my Bible today. I've been going through Romans and here's the passage for today:
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual[a] act of worship. 2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
In the great scope of God's mercy, giving up coffee for less than a month is such a stupid and ridiculously small thing to do...but yet it will be difficult for me AND my body to stick to! Thus the point of a fast, right? But I have to think that obeying in the small stuff will lead to obeying when it comes to big stuff. I want to experience God's good, pleasing and perfect will. I want to worship through sacrifice. So bubbye to beautiful brewing beans for now.
(I share this not to brag or try to make you give up stuff...it's just so that if I am short with you or a little slow...well...I might need your grace a little more than usual. Plus it can't hurt the accountability factor if my friends and family are in on this....)
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